EMOTION and MOTIVATION
Lets get down to the basics - in terms of action on the earth plane -at least according to the particular school of thought that I go by: Emotion is necessary for motivation if one also includes love, joy, and 'will to good' as emotions. For those who require a more stringent and limiting structure in order to limit destructive behavior, lower emotions such as fear, anger, and guilt may be the only useful motivators in the earlier stages of learning the lessons of life. Emotion arises out of one of the three "lower bodies" that compose the "body-mind": mental, emotional, and physical. The body mind, or various parts thereof, is what we identify with, via our ego's, in order for our souls to incarnate, to live, on the physical plane.
Emotions may attach to thoughts in order to form beliefs, which our ego uses to establish identity, place, direction, and purpose. Emotion relates directly to our desires as well as to our ideals. Here we get to define values in establishing the difference between our desires and our needs -- the latter of which relate to the Will of God. Hence our ideals and intentions should be established as directly related to (our clearest perception/belief of) what the Will of God for one's Being is. These learning processes involve trial and error, more pain to one degree or another, whether it may be so mild sometimes we laugh our way through it, or so intense we go into some form of shock and suppress the memory of it. The latter is more common to infants and children than most people realize, and is part of what I call the initial "setup" or "karmic induction" [references for this paragraph: essays, "The Alignment of Beliefs, Desires, and Needs...," "A Concept of Healing," and "To Structure or Not" by the author]
Hence, The more evolved the personality is, the more the personality relies on "higher" Intention levels of motivation for self and others (e.g.: love, empathy, purpose, etc., as compared to guilt, fear, anger, etc.).
Awareness of "Our Vehicles" on the Path, Fuel Efficiency, and Drive:
The body-mind can be compared to a vehicle in order to illustrate a relationship we can have with our feelings and emotions, most directly related to motivation or "drive". The body-mind is our vehicle for getting from where we are to where we want to be; it takes in fuel (needs and desires translate to motivation, or to fuel in this case). If it's your average junker, it runs on low to medium octane and pollutes the air badly (uses fuel like fear and anger). If it's a souped up standard, it might run on higher octane but it still pollutes (ie: like guilt), although maybe not as much. A cleaner fuel might be the lead-free gas (ie: obligation and then responsibility). And then we eventually come to use more and more of the high octane lead free fuel (ie: love). At about this point we start using systems and devices that require the higher octane fuels, do not pollute, and the fuels that are the most efficient of all (like pure joy and unconditional love).
["Unconditional love" falls into the same basket as "Perfection" - something you shoot for, knowing it's highly likely that you'll fall somewhere short of that - how short is a thing relative to each their own idea of perfection Related essays: "More On 'Ideals'" & "Idealism & the Concept of Perfection" at the page, "Compassion, Healing, and The Practitioner -- and Detouring 'Burn-out'"]
Also important to consider, in the trunk is baggage most likely (old hurts and judgments on/for self and/or others that one hasn't forgiven if even brought to conscious awareness), which requires that more fuel be used to pull the vehicle. As we are becoming more sensitized to the cleaner fuels and more efficient operation of the engine, we also notice more acutely the drag-effect that the baggage creates, and its effect on overall efficiency of the vehicle. And we become more and more motivated to clear the baggage out. There are various methods and techniques are for checking into the engine's efficiency (for gaining self-knowledge and applying it ) and for improving it - through re-aligning our systems with the high performance standards (with one' higher guidance/ "blueprint") and loosening ones baggage for more efficient travel.
We have to get our hands into the grease some, in order to get the gummy stuff out. With cars we might pay someone else to do the work. With body-minds, we can also benefit greatly from other's help - sometimes it's by contract and we pay them monetarily. Other times it just comes with life's relationships (and it might feel like we paid them ). On the other hand, Body-minds tend to be much more self-innovated and incomprehensible to others in the finer operating systems. Even with some overall guidance and practice assistance, we generally have to do a great deal of the detail work ourselves. And, in any case, that darnned baggage just won't fall out by itself usually. That's where this analogy might fail , since body-minds tend to become addicted to the baggage to the point where it can be quite painful to let go of the baggage.
In the end (and in the head, and from start to finish actually) , the re-alignment makes the fuel more efficient, but only the knowledge from hard-earned experience can re-design the engine, fuel delivery, and baggage handling systems in order to maintain and continually improve the capacity to use the higher octane fuels.
This next part of the story involves "the magic bus" - which is not about drugs, but about the Inner Children.1 That is, in the metaphor of "the bus" we are each driving, it is full of the many inner sub-personalities which compose the "normal" human psyche. The inner children represent our motivations or "agendas" or "scripts" set up since childhood, if you will - individually in some cases, more hod-podged in others. Which is a big part of how an individual is made up, per the metaphor, which goes like this: There are a handful or dozen children on the bus - some of whom you don't want to let drive the bus, without a great deal of close supervision. Others should not at all, although they can be useful in making suggestions. They can also be quite creative, playful, energetic, and so on. Others are quick to warn us of various dangers, or size up a person or situation, accurately or not. Meanwhile, we are engaging with other buses on the road of life, and our inner children are engaging with theirs - to the degree our emotional bodies are influencing our thoughts, words, actions. And that will always be to some degree or another.
"Magic Bus" (ah, but with a submarine component -- AND going in the opposite direction! Hmmm, What could that be symbolizing?)
[clipart edited by Chris Pringer]
1: A dense summary: An inner child is formed by an event early in infancy or childhood by an experience which the persona cannot fully process at the time, and which is suppressed (partially or wholly in order to protect the persona) and stored for later processing. In gestalt bodywork view, the memory is stored in the connective tissues (fascia, muscles, tendons) Coping mechanisms, sub-personalities, and roles are formed in order to deal with, create protection for, situations that unconsciously remind the persona of the traumatic events ("accurately" or not).
Another way of describing the Inner Child:
The only purpose for MOTIVATING OTHERS is to get the job done. It only needs to do that - pain is Not a necessity UNLESS thats the only way to get done just what has to be done. There are many ways to motivate. This implies that children, prisoners, nations, etc. do not need necessarily to experience pain in order to conform to appropriate standards. First try love, challenge, compassion, etc. and appeal to their higher nature. Then try mediation, compromise, or reward. Then try guilt or manipulation, etc. if absolutely necessary -- if nothing else works, in other words (when the objective is critical - otherwise the losses and karma would be greater for All concerned).
You cant beat, separate, or condemn someone (or some part of yourself) into healing or even changing. Under those conditions more feelings of rebellion and resistance to change are created. At best you create a fear- and pain-motivated person, society, or country that trains its offspring, its body, to be likewise motivated - which ends up cycling back to what you originally fought and denied and then acted as if there was no reason for. Acting as if there IS reason for a condition puts us in charge -gets us to the root of the need that the destructive behavior was created to fulfill. Then Healing can BEGIN. It seems to me that God wouldn't have said, "Be a nice and willing victim for awhile and then Ill reward you," But more likely S/he would have said something like, "Learn how to be all you can be - YOU have to discover your options, make decisions, and take risks and Ill help you when/if you listen."
We need new motivators, based on love and acceptance. The back and forth karmic cycle of abuser and abused is supposed to wake us up to need for new behavior and ways to transition us to it. It is not supposed to provide another justification for added insult and injury, more punishment and reward syndrome reinforcement, all of which maintains the attitudes that produce the abuse cycle in the 1st place. The cycle has to stop somewhere -revenge does not cure addiction! Revenge has become much of the motivation behind the systems we have created to provide justice - via reward and punishment.
If I believe my "victimizers" cannot heal, then how can I believe that I can heal - considering the laws of metaphysics? This implies that revenge is not applicable in the guise of justice or any other vehicle. Justice, then is taking into consideration the Present and all it implies, not focusing on feelings of the past; but on what the true needs for learning (by All concerned) are - not on how much punishment can be mustered out based on fixed laws and the various expectations of society. If I am to heal through personal resolution of my own issues, how much and what kind of focus can I engage in as regards the healing of my brother, my "victimizers"? How critical is this question to my own healing ?
So what other ways can we develop to transition us from where are now to where we want to be? It will happen -and likely take a few hundred years, but it has to be approached like there is faith in this or it wont happen. It has begun, so whats the next step? Whats the end product - what does that feel like, what would look like? I believe that God is not going to rob us of our learning process by "saving" us. God wants to be able to give US the credit, so well feel good about being with God.
Many that identify with the "new age" belief systems have apparently misinterpreted Richard Bachs statement "Argue for your limitations and theyre yours." One shouldnt have to convince another (especially a friend) that his/her pain is real - or felt as real. Claiming ones pain - for what it is as a subjective feeling, whether or not it can be described as rational, justified, or accurately associated, etc - is the first step to letting go of limitations. It is true that the act of claiming/owning ones pain may enforce limitation(s) for a time, depending on the (unconscious or even conscious) need to identify with the victim experience. Yet, it is denial that much more enforces limitations since (as perhaps the major point of this whole section) one doesn't process feelings that one doesn't feel. I admit that I've just been amazed at the degree of belief in a few "new age" self-healing techniques that refute or ignore that basic premise.
There is no real challenge to releasing illusion from ones awareness, depending on how one defines illusion and reality, of course. If someone needs a certain amount of structure (ie: "Religious leaders and corporate advertisers determine my values and needs") to learn in for a period of time, then s/he must believe in the reality of that structure to a certain degree. And letting go of the associated emotionally charged beliefs and perceptions would then be a considerable challenge. But once one acknowledges that one is "attached to" a reality and related mental, emotional, and physical material, then one can begin to let go of it. I like the sayings, "If you can feel it, you can heal it," and "one has to have an ego before one can transcend it."
And regarding ego nature: I believe most all of us have areas that can use a little ego building and a few areas where the ego is doing a *necessary* job of maintaining individuality and position in one's environment. Where the (true/actual) needs are felt as not having been taken care of is where the ego will try to protect in some way. This is where the addictions and other coping mechanisms come in. Therefore, upstaging or bragging, for instance, is not a sign of too *much* ego, but of protecting where there is too little. It's the very healthy ego that can be transcended, because at the level of full ego transcendence, the person is pretty much beyond any need for a body, position, or individuality anyway. (And I don't know that I've ever even met anyone of that caliber, by the way.)
There are folks who have forgiven themselves, having paid in some way what they consider is sufficient recompense, and having accepted that God has forgiven them for one reason or feeling or another. There are folks that feel or believe they (themselves) will never be forgiven, but also tend to think of others as unworthy of forgiveness also, regardless of how much recompense they feel they have paid in either case. And there are those that forgive others easily, with little or no recompense paid, but do not for themselves.
However, you can divide the latter into two groups, those that are actually like group two, but believe they forgive, while unconsciously forgetting without forgiving, and those that have been "trained" by experience from childhood to always find the essential unforgiveable fault within themselves.
And actually, all these groups are most influenced by their early experiences, whether or not their parents and/or guardians intended or even knew about any such belief formation, let alone about the future impact. We're keeping all this pretty simple here, but we could complicate the matter a wee bit - by further dividing these groups into those who tend to punish themselves first - after others victimize them (!!), and those who tend to punish others first. And then there's such questions of whether the harm-doer is required to pay or just anyone will do, which is a good place to stop digression; but all of which can effect the beliefs about, or the subjective (internal) influences upon, the nature of forgiveness.
IN ANY CASE, when someone is subjected to pressure from within or without to *ask for forgiveness*, the type of response to that pressure can depend greatly upon which group or groups that individual most falls into. In fact, we can probably easily imagine situations where two individuals, each from a different group, each expect the other to ask for forgiveness - and for the same event, or events they feel are the same or related in some way.
Ok, no big news flashes or insights yet, right? But now, based on the above, and upon how we have witnessed individuals acting, we can look at most wars down through history - groups of people who blame each other group for the cause of insult or damages to themselves - and we could trace their war(s) back to issues related to conflicting expectations, about who is "supposed" to ask whom for forgiveness and pay recompense, and/or whether anyone really needs to. That does sound familiar, right?
So, looking at all this pro-actively, the question might become how to mediate between individuals or groups that believe differently, not just about "the other", but about how forgiveness and recompense works, or whether it even happens, or whether it should happen. And perhaps, about what kind of recompense suffiently prevents wrong-doing and when, or simply influences an individual to become the most productive, loving, contributive, etc. And if we determined that for each type of individual, we might gain insight about groups in conflict as well. [ Related Ref: "The Empathy Movement" at the "Chalice Integration Arts & Sciences" page,]
No, I do not have all this "down" yet. I believe we are ALL in some kind of pain on some level, most of us appear unconscious of it or incredibly great actors, or both. But that seems to be part of how we are trained. It goes along with the co-dependent-required unconscious beliefs that "a good person can't tell another's pain from one's own", that "sympathy is good yet one isn't to feel sorry for oneself", that "martyrdom is godly" but "losers and victims are mostly just manipulating", yet that "pain is God's message that one has been bad or wrong". (Phew!) Under the scourge of such contradictory beliefs, many in society speak or act as if this perception is "safer, kinder, and more productive" (!?!) and have pretended pain "is just not happening" within one's realm of influence. So in the name of national financial priorities we have too often ignored the crucial needs of our elderly and youth, our teachers and our progeny. With that, we could add the one about "No pain, no gain" (or rather it's metaphorical spill even into the baby's bath water, and other cliches) but I save that for another page.
I believe pains are also like handicaps, challenges, and gifts. Everyone has them, some folks are just more adept at hiding them - from themselves and/or from others. And all four are highly related. Sister Theresa had her own pain just like the rest of us, but she had learned to have compassion for pain (perhaps her greatest gift - to others since she worked hard for it) without making herself or anyone else wrong for having/feeling/expressing it. Well that's my take on it. And Buddha and Jesus is still hanging out with the folks on earth, so what's keeping Them from moving on? Maybe These Folks could be 'out of here' and away from us but apparently They're not. It's also taught that even They are still continuing Their (spiritual) growth thing, and that part of Their responsibility (as part of that growth) is working with us. So, I think "it's not over 'til it's over," and that we cross a major hurdle when we just stop making wrong the *fact* that we are in pain.
Which is not to say the *reasons* for that pain don't need to be dealt with, pre-empted if/wherever possible, and done so as a major priority. Hence the need for communication of pain in an appropriate manner - which manner apparently may require a whole new addition to the human educational system. Afterall, on the one hand, we don't dare deny the human nervous system without considerable risk, and yet on the other, the social systems of more's and expectations about how and when we communicate pain to each other are a maze of contradictions in understanding. [was "More personally speaking" Mar'96; rev' July'13; ref: essays, "Notes on Pain, Awareness & Denial," and "Victims, Compassion, & Responsibility -- Notes on The Emotional-Body, Denial of Pain, & Easy Answers," by the author]
"Integration" by Krysta Gibson About Common myths vs realities about psycho-spiritual integration; effective guidance about feelings and memories, 'living in the now', 'releasing' events and people, 'forgiving and forgetting' the past - for living the spiritual life fully and meaningfully. Originally published by Krista Gibson in "The New Times" of Seattle. Through the late 80's & most of the 90's, I always read Krysta's essays if I didn't have time to read anything else, and kept copies of various or her articles handy for my clients to take home with them. Still current...
"Understanding the Pattern Triad and The Body Pattern Assessment" (Rev'd & New Sections, 12/27/09) Mind-Body Relationships and *coping mechanisms, *challenges, and *gifts on one's Life Path. This page is about how the body has habitually responded to experience is evidenced by the body's holding and movement patterns. Includes "Notes on Mind-Body Correlations - Source-References, Organization of *Body Memory,* and 'WHAT I DO' " (New 12/27/09). Other sections include excerpts from "Body Memory and ... Learning Life Lessons." About aspects to be discovered, emotionally cleared, and then employed as mental/emotional assets and guidance towards determining and accomplishing life goals. Note: Keywords referring to, or related to, the same phenomenon: fascia memory, somatic memory, tissue memory, muscle memory, somatic experience, somatic healing, somatic therapy.
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